Friday, 27 September 2013 close yet so far.

Sorry I haven't posted for awhile..but a lot of stuff have been going on in my life what is not adopted related and to keep my sanity...I have sort of stayed away from adopted related stuff.

As some of you know my son was placed for adoption in Greece and since 2009 I have sort of a biannually taken a trip to Greece...oddly I picked up a book for my trip down here where there was a sort of a Oscar Wilde quotation (supposedly): "The heart always return to wherever it hurts the most" which is very true for me.

My trips to Greece are more to be in the same place as my son is rather than orchestrating a reunion...there are plans in place for this and it is taking a long time...then again, I have decided that any reunion should happen on his terms not how I want it to happen.

So here I am, off to this big shopping centre in Athens to have lunch. OK, I did have an ulterior motive, I knew where my son would most likely be in the evening and wanted to go there...hoping to catch a glimpse of him...just to see him in the flesh would have been great.

Then there I am in the shopping centre and who should suddenly appear before me on the escalator, but my own flesh and blood. So bad me...I followed him to a coffee shop, where he looked straight at me. I didn't speak to him at all, just started to shake like a leaf ordered my coffee in extreme bad Greek and went to he outside terrace where low and behold he is sitting about 10 meters from me. I sat down and had my drink stealing a few glances at him...just hope I was not staring at him, but I did see that he was looking my direction too...most likely feeling stared at. When I calmed down, I went about my business and just thought how lucky I was to have seen he in person. Then about 30 minutes later I go up an escalator as he goes down, he just looks at me and carries on with his friend...I dare not look back at him and just get out shopping centre as fast as I can.

Maybe I should have said something, but what can you say? "Hello I'm your mother", when he was there with his friend? Hopefully, it was a spark of recognition on his part rather than him wondering why is this woman staring at me.

If anything, I can take with me from this trip is that my son is a beautiful creature with the most amazing eyes I will ever see...and one day I dare to hope they will look at me and know how I am, rather than some crazy woman who stared at him in a shopping centre in Athens.

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