Thursday, 8 March 2012

Is there a female version of being emasculated?

I have been holding back on this post but something a set me off today.  You see... I a survivor  and I know I can handled myself.. so after leaving a friends house today and they asking me if I would be "safe" on my journey home, it got me thinking... why do some "friends" think that what they say to "protect" you actually make you feel less of a person.

There is not a word for feeling emasculated for us ladies.. maybe we should call it efeminateing but that does not sound right... tried to find a word cover that and the only thing which came up was belittling us.

OK, to explain this... a couple of weeks ago... a a work colleague's "friend" thought they was going to do a fantastic  prank... now personally I did not think if funny... in essence the prank was to call me claiming that they was looking for my friend as they were a debt collector... and unless my  colleague coughed up a certain amount of money this so called debt collector would come and break my legs.

Because, I am me, I realised about 30 seconds into the call who was calling and that it was a so called joke.... I left it for a while and then told my colleague what their so called "friend" have been up to.

Now here it is getting annoying... as I said to my colleague the joke was bad but and I would would appreciate that their "friend" would stop their stupid prank calls... by the way, this was not the first one (but normally something stupid like do we stock Animal Farm or Deep Throat).  My colleague  then decides to tell their friend off... but in the process tell this idiot that I'm now too scared to work  by myself... HELLO..if my colleague had stopped to think for a minute they would realised that their so called "friend" would have lasted about a second of me telling them off... but in their wisdom they decided that the best way to dealing with the situation was to say that the prank freaked me out and I was in essence a "little" girl who could take care of myself.

Guess what... the prank was less upsetting to me than my colleague telling their "friend" that I am now to scared to work alone.  Seriously... why does your friend's best intention actually end up belittling you that much... the people who should know you should really know should know what situations you can handle.

As I said to to my other friend tonight, I can handle myself... I am comfortable enough walk by though London by myself in the middle of the night... and rightly and wrongly, I would pity anyone who tried anything... firstly I have been told I have a a mean right hook and apparently when I get angry I'm very scary.

So to all my friends, please respect the fact that when I say I will be OK, I will be OK... don't try to "help" me in a way that disrespects me or belittles my feelings...but at the same time sometimes when I do say I'm OK... I'm really not... but I do not need to belittled... I need your support

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