Seaching for my son

I was watching a documentary the other night called "Searching for my son". The documentary followed the personal journeys of two women as they embark on a search for their long-lost adopted children placed for adoption in the 1960's.

Although our circumstances are different there were some similarities between me and the two women featured, Mo and Peta. They were very different and had dealt with their adoptions differently.

Peta, did seem to be most scarred by the adoption process, but she had been open about the adoption to people around her, so she had family and friends supporting her search for her son. There was a lovely moment in the documentary where after the first contact, her son had sent her some photographs. She described feeling like she just had a new baby - that is how I felt when I first found your FB profile and saw your photos. I can only describe that feeling as euphoria.

The other lady, Mo, was a bit more pragmatic (not sure if that is the right word) but she had kept her son a secret and only told a few people, so the adoption process had affected her in a different way. But I identified with her more. She said that she wasn't thinking about her son every second of every day and there could be weeks where he did not enter her head at all and that more me.

Don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean that you are ever out of my heart - just that my day-to-day life must go on. However, this year there have not a day gone by without I'm wondering what you are doing, how you might react to me etc, but that is because I can "check" up on you now.

The documentary also featured an organisation here in the UK who deals with adoption reunions, Norcap, one of their number said that it was always worth the risk in making contact. As for every adoptee who is upset by the approach, there are more who welcome the truth. I just hope that when the time comes you are one of those adoptees who welcomes the truth.

I just hope that 2010 will be our year.

Για τώρα Καλά Χριστούγεννα και Ευτυχισμένο το Νέο Έτος.

Αγαπώ γιο xxx

Legacy of an Adopted Child

A friend of mine pointed me in the direction of this poem... I have to admit it is very fitting and I hope you one day will agree with these words.

Once there were two women
Who never knew each other;
One you do not remember,
The other you call "Mother."
Two different lives
Shaped to make you one;
One became your guiding star,
The other became your sun.

The first one gave you life,
And the second taught you to live it;
The first gave you a need for love,
The second was there to give it.

One gave you a nationality,
The other gave you a name;
One gave you talent,
The other gave you aim.

One gave you emotions,
The other calmed your fears;
One saw your first sweet smile,
The other dried your tears.

One sought for you a home
That she could not provide;
The other prayed for a child
And her hope was not denied.

And now you ask me
Through your tears ...
The age old question,
Unanswered through the years.

Heredity or environment ...
Which are you a product of?
Neither ... my darling ... neither,
Just two different kinds of love!

So to however wrote this poem... thank you for putting my feelings down in words.

Xρονια πολλά, γιε μου

Εντάξει, έχω το όνομα σας ακριβώς για εδώ, αλλά ευτυχισμένος γιορτή γιο.

Όλα αγάπη μου, μαμά